Hushabye

Sep. 9th, 2006 07:59 pm
Nea is your sister
Rob he is your dad
I am just your Mammy
It can't be so bad

==

Eemshie weemshie wumsie
Eemshie weemshie woo

(Traditionally sung to the tune of "Lily Marlene", over and over, until the baby is happy - has served two Emers of my acquaintance so far, to my certain knowledge, and will doubtless serve more)

==

Here I am alone with you
alone with you, alone with you
Here I am alone with you
with no idea what to do
Here I am alone with you
your sister's gone, your Daddy too
Here I am alone with you
... sshhhh, boo. Sshhhh, boo.
when baby runs is now available from lulu.com. As they have changed their distribution systems, it doesn't have an ISBN yet; I thought sales of before baby walks would pay for it but the price has gone up considerably.

Shipping: International Economy shipping is about 4 US dollars. I can get a bulk discount so might, if enough people order, be able to get books to people in the UK and Ireland for £6 and £6.50 sterling respectively. The shipping discount they used to offer appears to be no longer available, so I can't sell 'em for a fiver any more. I still have a few before baby walks for a fiver though.

The bump

Jul. 17th, 2006 10:04 pm
It's hot and enormous
It burgeons and bloats
And somewhere within it
A somebody floats

It's confining, elastic
Can be stretched at the sides
And somewhere within it
Someone's making it wide

It's rounded, with corners
Pushing out from the top
And somewhere within it
Somebody's dropped
I hear thunder
I hear thunder
Hark don't you?
Hark don't you?
Pitter-patter baby
Pitter-patter baby
In my womb
Romper Room
Nobody knows that I'm pregnant
Nobody gives half a damn
The only difference this time
Is the toddler holding my hand

A woman unburdened with babies
Outside of her burgeoning bump
Is an object of some fascination
To every half-witted chump

But a woman who's already got one
Doesn't even get asked "When's it due?"
The grannies who groped the bump last time
Don't even see there's a Bump Number Two.

On the rare and enchanting occasions
I venture outdoors all alone
I'm a woman of Ur-fertile mystery
Well-attended by everyone.

But when I am carrying babies,
One inside, one under my arm,
And the shopping-bags over my shoulder,
I see less delight, more alarm.
One feed a day and my heart is slowly breaking
One feed a day just before the bedtime kiss
One feed a day and it feels like mostly faking
One feed a day is the feed I'm going to miss
Inch by inch, and toe by toe:
This is how the baby grows
Grazed knees, grazed hands, and grazed elbows

Word by word, and yell by yell:
This is how she casts her spell
She wants, she asks, she story-tells

Grin by grin and weep by weep:
This is how she goes to sleep
Warm arms, warm bed, warm love to keep

Two years

Apr. 30th, 2006 12:25 am
There is no-one so strong, no-one so sweet
As confident and beautiful she stands
From wisps of golden hair to sturdy feet

Every day I'm privileged to meet
This child so capable with gentle hands
There is no-one so strong, no-one so sweet

I stop and stare at her out in the street
She walks ahead as though she owns the land
From wisps of golden hair to sturdy feet

Her tenderness is infinite, her joy a treat
She changes daily like the tide, the sands
There is no-one so strong, no-one so sweet

Her mouth is made for kissing as we greet
She dances as if dance grows from her hands
From wisps of golden hair to sturdy feet

She is more graceful and by far more fleet
Than ever she was dreamed of in our plans
There is no-one so strong, no-one so sweet
From wisps of golden hair to sturdy feet
It's almost midnight
She's almost two
Oh, take the fucking knife away
I haven't time to bleed to day
I've cakes to bake and games to play
So take the fucking knife away

Kisses

Mar. 30th, 2006 11:00 pm
A little soft mouth stretched wide in a grin
Full of love and of fragments of food
Coming in for a smiling, delightful, beguiling
Kiss for a parent who's good

A little soft mouth learning mouths kiss more gently
And that closing your mouth is polite
Coming up for a loving, endearing, and shoving
Kiss for goodbye and goodnight

A little soft mouth all puckered and sweet
Full of care and attention to form
Coming over so skillful, affectionate, wilful
Kiss like the acceptable norm

But I can remember the times when she dived us
And landed with teeth and chins clashing
And giggled and wriggled with nothing behind it
Than an unfettered babyish passion
Hush little baby, don't make a sound
I feel you kicking, swimming around
I know you're listening when I sing
I'm sure that you know everything

But hush little baby, it's not your turn
I feel I need to be quite firm
I don't want pickles with my lunch
You'll get to taste pickles in just 12 months

Hush little baby, don't say ham
I don't think it goes well with jam
I can't find any marmalade
I don't know how tahini's made

Hush little baby, don't make a sound
I feel you kicking, swimming around
I know you're hungry for a treat
But in twenty weeks you can have a teat
Meemee sad? she asked, and she hugged me
And she kissed Meemee full on the mouth
And I cried for the sheer overwhelming
Tenderness, adultness, youth.
Hush little baby, don't say a word,
Mama's going to follow the common herd
And if those common teeth come loose,
Mama's going to feed you bottles of juice,
And if those bottles of juice don't choke,
Mama's going to feed you Diet Coke,
And if the Diet Coke gets spilt,
Mama's eating chocolate to assuage her guilt
And if the chocolate bar gets shared,
Mama's going to be shocked that she dared,
And if the shock is hard to bear,
Mama's going to buy you designer wear,
And if the designer wear's no good
Mama's going to cheer you up with food
And if the food's not cheering you
Mama's got a nice big TV, too!

Pyjama day

Nov. 15th, 2005 01:32 pm
Pyjama day, pyjama day -
Toast and mashed banana day -
Ginger drinks and tissues day -
Snuffly sniff atishoo day!

Pyjama day, pyjama day -
TV watch-o-rama day -
Cartoons and loons with soupspoons day -
Grown men in pantaloons day!

Here we go

Nov. 3rd, 2005 03:09 pm
Here we go round the dining room, the dining room, the dining room
Here we go round the dining room, on a rainy Thursday morning
Here we go up on the sofa - up, the sofa - up, the sofa - up,
Here we go up on the sofa - up, on a rainy Thursday morning
Here we go cuddling snuggles and love, snuggles and love, snuggles and love,
Here we go cuddling snuggles and love, on a rainy Thursday morning.
I have to examine you
But I will let you have
A sheet to drape over your knees,
A gooey latex glove

I have to examine you
There's no room for your mate
This stranger is a chaperone
Your husband can just wait

I have to examine you
It's not causing you pain
I think you're just too uptight
I'll start over again

I have to examine you
Come on, take off your pants
Get down there on the table
This student wants a chance

I have to examine you
You shouldn't want a choice
It's all for your own good, you know
It's good you've lost your voice
(Inspired by http://www.livejournal.com/users/elynne/858043.html)

I'm underprivileged. I have no pool.
My kids don't go to private school.
I'm underprivileged, but that's ok -
I can get by from day to dy.

These folks are poor. They're hungry, cold,
They're going ot die before they're old
They have no jobs, they have no homes.
If they get sick, they're on their own.

I suggest you start to bake
Before you say "Let them eat cake."
Having a baby
Means that every snap of crowds shows me the babies
Held shoulder-high

Having a baby
Means that every time the evening news is about a baby
I want to cry

Having a baby
Means that every time the news mentions a baby
I fear it will die

Having a baby
Means that all the hungry, lonely, frightened babies
Are crying close by.
"Dit donc," she says, meaning "Donkey,"
And "Di di!" which we figure means "drink,"
And "Daddy" we know means a dog or a cat,
And "Down" tells us "Up," so we think.

It doesn't do to be caught napping
When you're interpreting toddler-ese.
It's embarrassing to be corrected
Because Mammy forgot to say "Pease."
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