I have what I can only describe as a limited number of copies, but I can almost certainly deliver them faster than lulu can. People in the USA are better off ordering from Lulu. I make more money that way, too :)
The poems included in the collection are these.
I have received some copies of my book from the printers and can sell them on - prices in pounds sterling including postage and packing are £5.00 within the UK and £5.50 in the rest of Europe. I could in theory send to the USA but there's no point. Prices for other continents available on application.
I have what I can only describe as a very limited number of copies (5), but I can almost certainly deliver them faster than lulu can. People in the USA are better off ordering from Lulu. I make more money that way, too :)
The poems included in the collection are these.
I noticed that "Lulu offers free shipping for domestic and international orders between $25 and $100. To take advantage of this great deal, simply choose SuperSaver Shipping as your shipping option at checkout" which means that if four people in the same country wanted to buy The Book they could club together, as it were. Someone suggested I sort this out myself in a central way but it would take way too much organisation and I don't have it.
These are the poems included in the collection.
If I sell seven more books, I can get it listed on amazon.com - that would be amusing.
[Crossposted from ailbhe]
Someone has received a copy of before baby walks, the first printed collection of some of my poems, and says that it's "lovely and delightful!" so I am now offering it for sale to anyone who would like a copy. The first reader pointed out a typo, which has been fixed, and some issues with the cover, which haven't, because I can't work out how.
I still haven't received a copy myself, but I trust the judgement of the person who has. And I'm dead jealous, of course. And excited beyond belief.
I hope everyone else who has already ordered copies likes them, typo and all. Thanks, folks.
Everywhere we go, she makes friends. People frequently comment on how pretty she is, how bonny, how attractive, how smiley. My continuing mantra of "Every mother thinks their baby is best" is fading, gradually benig replaced by the more forceful "they say these things about all babies, she's not really that different, you just think so because you're her mother."
We were waiting for a bus with her auntie this morning, at about 8 am, and the ticket inspector came and pulled faces at her, and tickled her cheek, and talked about his grandson. then we went for coffee and four women at a nearby table smiled and grinned to make her smile. Then we came here, to the Biscuit Tin Cafe, and the usual horde of admirers assembled. Yesterday and Friday, too, her auntie continually commented on how many friends she makes everywhere.
It has been a good nine months. In four days, she'll be longe rout than in, and we ilke her this way.
Good thing: I can get food off a spoon myself now, no waiting for Mammy to get the thing into my mouth. It's a matter of turning the spoon over and using my tongue.
Bad thing: This appears to result in more post-prandial washing.
Good thing: I can pull myself up to a standing position using the safety gates. Escape is in sight!
Bad thing: I lose sight of it when I let go with both hands and fall over sideways.
Good thing: I can balance for a second or two without holding on.
Bad thing: Mammy and Daddy know this and will never leave me unsupervised again.
Good thing: Peas! Wow, they're green.
Bad thing: Peas when I'm not in the mood.
Good thing: Getting rid of a dirty nappy!
Bad thing: Putting on a clean one.
Good thing: Teeth! I have five, and one coming.
Bad thing: Not being allowed to bite people as much as I was before teeth.
Good thing: Crawling!
Bad thing: Getting caught just as it's getting interesting.
Carrots are better than broccoli and potato, but it's all pretty good. I wonder why they gave me parsnip only once? I liked that too. I think they'll give in soon and give me as much grown-up food as I want, because I get more enthusiastic every time.
Today I had my teeth brushed. Mammy was a little paranoid about the fact that I have two teeth and had a fruity mango-squish dessert. It wasn't too bad - there's no proof that toothpaste was involved at all, but she says there was. It made an interesting interruption to the bath.
My feet have outgrown shoes that were too big less than a month ago. Mammy's cross and proud at the same time. It's very funny.
Just wait until I learn to swear in context.
Today we went swimming, and I ate a big yellow elephant. I can hold onto the side and spiderwalk along the wall of the pool. There was a fantastic warm shower afterwards, but then I had to get dressed again. My swimsuit is too small.
Today's squish: Broccoli and potato, about a teaspoonful.
I get a highchair soon; I'm outgrowing all my other chairs. Bet I can outgrow my pushchair too, before I can sit up properly.
I'm glad I met my Gammel-Mormor before she died. My Nana is coming to see me on Wednesday, and my auntie is coming a month from today.
Tomorrow we're going out shopping again. It's deathly dull until we reach the Biscuit Tin Cafe where there are toys and coloured lights and a horde of devoted admirers. I need more devoted admirers. When's the next DWCon?
But this weekend I learned to play a game. I grin at Mammy, and drop my face onto the bed. When she says Byebye! because she can't see me, I raise my head and grin at her, which makes her say "Hello!" Then we both grin and giggle and I do it again. And again. And again.
This doesn't work as well on a hard restaurant table. Luckily, milk cures all ills.
Yesterday I made Mammy play "Head, Shoulders, Knees and Toes," and I didn't tell her until afterwards that she was playing with her back to the window, the curtains open, and the lights on. Now anyone who wants to knows her hip measurement. Bendy Mammy!
Today I am four months old. Yesterday a tooth I've been whinging about poked its way out of my gum, so I'm happier now. The day before that, we went to the park and I played on the swings. Mammy is too wide for them and Daddy is too tall, so they took turns.
I've seen a lot of people since I was 3 months old. I went to Ireland where I saw Nana, Auntie Niamh, Auntie Orla, lots of Mammy's friends, Great-Aunt Deirdre and Great-Aunt Maire. I met two toddlers, who were both very nice to me, and went on trains, planes, boats, buses, cars and minibuses. I haven't been on a bicycle, a hovercraft, a tram, a hydrofoil or a rickshaw (unless buggies count?) or a palanquin or a helicopter.
My favourite game is "Scaring Mammy". A good way to do this is to develop a new skill, use it once, and then never use it again. I've rolled over and over until I was underneath the gas fire, stood up holding onto the fireguard, propelled myself forwards while prone (she didn't see this so she doesn't know how I did it - Nac Mac Feegles, perhaps?).
They keep trying to fob me off with teaspoonsful of food. I saw them! They mashed up loads of nummy food and measured off a level teaspoonful of each one to freeze. But I'll get there - the louder I get, the less reluctant they are to give me solids too early, so I figure by the time I canbreak glass with my voice alone I'll be on roast venison. Bananas are yum, carrots are ok, and potatoes are yuk.
I'm teaching my parents to say "How high?" with just the right amount of deference. Last week, I stopped breathing and Mammy had to work hard to start me up again. Today, I had my second set of immunisations. What guilt! Ever since, I've been making her sing, bounce, move me from seat to playmat to lap to seat to cot to walkies and back again. She force-fed me some evil pink strawberry-flavoured "medicine" and then I agreed to doze off.
I'm still a heffalump, and need a fresh nappy every couple of hours, even though I don't have an infection or anything.
I'm doing my best to outgrow my travel cot before it ever gets used. Watch me gain! Woohoo!
Today, Daddy introduced me to the baby in the bathroom mirror. I've already met the baby in the dining room mirror, who is quite nice and friendly, but the baby in the bathroom mirror was so exciting that I had to look away momentarily lest I became overwrought. When I was in no further danger of exploding with delight, I looked back, in case the baby had gone away again. It hadn't! It grinned at me, so I grinned back. Whee!
I'm 11 weeks old now. Mirrors are probably the best thing going after standing up. Ah, and nipples, of course. And baths. And going out in the pushchair.
I help Daddy cook, and wash dishes. I'm particularly good at cooking because of my early-cultivated interest in food. I can sleep through washing up in a very talented way. When he's working, I help Daddy read email and debug DNS issues. I don't like disposable nappies because they dry me out a little more than is comfortable; I'm pretty sure skin isn't supposed to crackle.
Yesterday I had to outscream a powertool in order to be heard; it wasn't very nice. And I got mildly bitten by insects, but I have no immune reaction so I didn't swell up much. Walking on grass is fun, and so is falling down onto my nose.
|Week 1: 30 April - 6 May:
Can turn her head to see Daddy when she hears his voice. Can track a moving object. Can focus on a face. Can roll from side to side vigorously enough to turn over but only does this once. Hates baths.
|Week 2: 7-13 May:
At 9 days old, has gained back all lost weight and is 4 oz over her birthweight. The day she was two weeks old, I left the house - we went for lunch at the corner cafe. She loved baths by now because we stopped using water at 37C and started using water which was actually warm. On 8 May, she focussed her eyes on something other than a face. Her first bath at home was on 12 May.
Week 3: 14-20 May:
At 16 days, she slept 6 hours through the night and was given her first soother / dummy / pacifier. I left the house again and actually got as far as the corner and all the way across the road.
Week 4: 20-27 May:
I made it as far as the town centre. Linnea proved she is good at dealing with new people. She smiled.
Week 5: 28 May - 3 June:
I was able to do most things around the house, and pick her up when she needed it most of the time. I still used soothers when I couldn't. I was still taking a little milk in my diet but not much, and Linnea was still having some colicky symptoms but not many. We used a lot of Infacol and she spat up a lot.
Week 6: 4-10 June:
She slept 7 hours through the night at least once. We took her footprints for thank-you cards. She met her paternal aunt. On 9 June, she was moved from the Moses basket to her cot because she tipped the Moses basket up and almost fell out! Her favourite lullaby is "Toreador".
|Week 7: 11-17 June:
Her first proper laugh! 12th June.
|Week 8: 18-24 June:
I had a day with no painkillers and no antibiotics.I was referred for restitching.
|Week 9: 25 June - 1 July:
The day she was 9 weeks old she had her first set of immunisations. She also smiled at me. The vaccination gave her a big hard lump under the skin of her thigh.
|Week 10: 2-8 July:
|Week 11: 9-15 July:
|Week 12: 16-22 July:
We did some baby massage at postnatal classes, and covered basic safety. Linnea liked baby massage. We brought Linnea to the doctor because she had a cough and seemed to stop breathing and were told not to worry.
|Week 13: 23-29 July:
We spent a night in the paediatric ward with Linnea attached to a pulse monitor which she was able to set off by curling her toes. She thought this was great.
|Week 14: 30 July - 5 August:
We bought a book of photos of babies' faces.We had the first false alarm with the baby monitor. We brought her swimming at the public pool for the first time and she loved that too.
|September: Started to crawl||29 August 2004: First tooth
6 September 2004: second tooth
|26 October 2004:
Loves crawling, singing and swimming
|24 October 2004: Fifth tooth|
Sat up alone - pulled self up, and stayed sat up.
31 Oct: Cruised the furniture!
|09 November 2004: 6th tooth
20 November 2004: 7th tooth
|02/02/2005: Took first steps alone, with someone other than Mammy to witness it.|
|25/07/2005: Can also climb well, walk over 1 mile alone or holding hands (including some uphill!), feed herself with a spoon or a fork when she feels like it (though sometimes turns it over before it gets to her mouth), respond to simple "Give Mammy the ..." requests (often with a headshake and/or "No!"), respond to "Night night" by taking Mammy's hand and leading her to the bedroom, where Linnea gets onto the bed and tucks her legs underneath the covers. She still needs to be fed or walked to sleep, though.||Can say words: Hiya, Hello, Thank you, There, That, Ball, Birdie, Pussy, Baby, No.|
|28/07/05 Goggie (doggie)|
|30/07/05 Daddie (doggie)|
|02/08/05 Nana (Banana)|
|04/08 Teddy, Bye|
|07/08 Gow (Car)|
|16/08 Pane (plane), Tea|
|17/08 Deep-daw (see-saw), Dai (Train)|
|29/08 Meemee (Mammy), Daddy|
|02/09 Buddy (Buggy)|
|08/09 Boy (Boing!) - also can jump both feet off the floor|
|17/09 Boots, Bite|
|18/09 Peas (green peas)|
|By 19/09 can run, walk, climb up the slide, turn around sit safely, and slide. Can sit on a big-girl swing and not fall off while pushed; leans back to make the swing go more. Removes nappy when wet, unless too many clothes in the way. Occasionally removes nappy *before* wet, which is... messy. May be beginning to say More and Bot (bottom). Insists on ringing the doorbell before entering the house. May say "book" but it's unclear and unreliable. Can drink from an adult cup or glass without spilling if she concentrates.Will put things back when told "Put it back" and will often even close the cupboard / drawer too. May be saying "Towel" as a get-out-of-bath request. Can climb, will climb. Definitely likes Isabelle and recognises her buggy and seeks her out. Is affectionate (um, with vigour) to other toddlers, but fairly gentle with babies if supervised. Likes to hug, cuddle, kiss, pat, stroke hair, and bump noses. Does bite Mammy but no-one else so far, we think. When someone is crying she will often pat, offer something, or just go up close and look concerned. The best toy is one someone else is using.||19/09 Pease (please)|
|23/09: Now! Wassat?|
|25/09: Potty, Doan (phone)|
|27/09: Does (toes)|
|30/09: More, Ess (yes)|
|01/10: Dass (dance)|
|by 03/10: dit-donc (donkey, dog)
03/10: Di-dow (sit down), Duck, Dat (cat), Beh (bear), Book
|06/10: Cow, Owl, Bus, Peet (pig)|
|08/10: Eye, wa-wa (quack quack)|
|09/10: Zzz (insect), Wy (away)|
|11/10: Orse (Horse)|
|14/10: Pwing (swing), Thass (That's what you want, ie breastmilk)|
|15/10: Toys, teeth|
|27/10: Row-row, Butting (button), Watch, Clock|
|by 08/11: Bikkit, nack (snack), hot-tea, knee, "No down. Knee! Up!", wokkeen (walking), wun (run), one-thee (one two three, ie "more than one"), Bass (bath)|